December 31, 2012, The Thirsty Moose, Toronto
“I still can't believe it,”
said Jasmine Bryar, reacting to the news that Jesper Mattson of the Colorado
Rockies wouldn't face further discipline for his elbow on Pittsburgh Penguin
Petr Taticek.
“It wasn't suspendable,”
argued her friend, Pete Moyer. “It was unfortunate but he didn't mean to do it.
I think the case is closed.”
Bryar sighed. “I still don't
buy it. Fact of the matter is, Mattson is a key player to Colorado...that's why
he avoided suspension.”
“Oh no...here we go again.”
“Deny it all you want, but
stars do get preferential treatment.”
“Hey, I remember when Doug
Gilmour was suspended for nine games because of an incidental slash...don't
tell me stars get preferential treatment.”
“That was a different era,”
said Bryar. “Robert Browning wasn't around then...we all know he caters to
corporate interests. It's why we have to have these degrading cheerleaders at
every game.”
“Come on...the cheerleaders
are not degrading.”
Bryar gave Moyer a
disbelieving look.
“Jasmine...you know me...my
support has nothing to do with
staring at them.” Bryar held her look. “Okay...maybe a little...but still...I think it's progressive. Other sports have
cheerleaders...why can't hockey?”
“Because in other sports,
cheerleaders are more than just eye candy. They actually do things, like dance and sing...they're entertaining. Our
cheerleaders just stand there waving stupid pompoms and shovelling ice...and
every costume is designed just so it can be revealing...there's nothing
artistic about them. Is there any other reason why the shirts to the Carolina
Hurricanes' 'Storm Squad' are tight-fitting and just 'happen' to end right
before the navel?”
“I like the look...it's the
'Kim Possible' look. She's sexy.”
“I agree, but that's because
Kim Myers made it her look. She's got
this whole punk/rocker vibe to her so her midriffs suit her. There's nothing
about any of these cheerleading outfits that suggest they're anything but
sexual.”
Moyer sighed, realizing the
debate wasn’t going anywhere, but still ended cheerfully. “Suit yourself…one of
these days I’m going to show you just how great the Maple Leaf cheerleaders
are!” Bryar could only hang her head in shame, not believing that last
statement was even worth a rebuttal.
“Listen,” started Bryar with
a concerned tone. “I do think something needs to be done with this game.”
“We say that all the time,”
said Moyer.
“I know...and every time I say I'm going to get protests going and such
and I never do...but this time it's different. I finally have a stable job, so
I have the time and resources to get this thing moving. Besides, my job at Empire
could even help promote the protests this time.”
“That would be a conflict of interest, wouldn't it?”
“Not if I sell it correctly. In any case, I know how to do it on my own,
so we'll start off there.”
“We'll?” Pete was perplexed.
“Yes. Why, you don't want to be a part of it?”
“I do...but I'm not sure what I'll bring.”
“Passion and the will to make a difference...which you have in spades.
That's all I need.” Bryar and Moyer smiled, pleased at the development before
getting back to their drinks, upon which Moyer brought up his son's toothache
for the fourteenth time.
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